It was about 20 degrees Fahrenheit this morning and I took a drive out to Jones Beach on Long Island. I had my new digital camera to take a few pictures and I got one of the sun reflecting off the ocean. I put it in the comments section of my profile. I am pleased with how it came out.

I can't say I ever was a Miley Cyrus fan but this is a pretty great song.

Party in the U.S.A. - Miley Cyrus

Youtube - Video

I just watched this movie for the first time. Fictional but very well done and not boring even though it is almost 3 hours long.

This is a story about a girl named Ruby, who I have not written about before. She is, like everyone I have blogged about, a real person I knew and this is what I know about her. I knew her in the 90s, and while I didn't know her real well she had an interesting story.

Ruby was a quite attractive girl probably in her late 20s when I knew her. She was one of those girls you sometimes meet in Manhattan that had big dreams but had not really achieved them. She was an aspiring musician and was part of a band though I didn't really think she would have any real future in music. Now the Phil Spector connection. Years before Phil Spector was charged mith murdering a young woman, Ruby told me that she had met Phil Spector and he had promised to help her with her music career. Coincidentally I knew another girl who had met Phil Spector and he had made a similar promise. I thought then, and I think it has been confirmed years later, that Phil Spector was using his legendary rock and roll background to meet young women. I can't say I blame him although he was obviously out of control and out of touch with reality that ended up in a murder conviction.

Anyway, back to Ruby. I liked her although we were just friends. She had big dreams in the big city which made her interesting. She told me that in the 80s she had been a groupie for the alternative rock band the Replacements which had some critical success and some minor hits. Ruby said she would follow the band around from city to city, but she made a point to tell me that she never had sex with the band. But heck, isn't that a big part of what a groupie does? I last saw Ruby in 1998 and by then she had had a baby, her life was probably a bit more complicated, and I think her music career was firmly on hold at the time. But she was an interesting girl to know, which makes me think of this song by the Replacements. It is probably my favorite song by them.

The Replacements - Kiss Me On The Bus

Youtube - Video

The music in this song is stunning and has some of my favorite lyrics:

I promised you a miracle
Belief is a beauty thing
Promises promises
As golden days break wondering
Anything is possible in the game of life...

Simple Minds - Promised You a Miracle

Youtube - Video

You may be in the middle of a struggle, but you've got to have the right perspective. That challenge was never meant to destroy you. It was meant to promote you. The very fact that you are facing adversity tells me that your destiny is within reach. When you come through that adversity, you will reach a new level. You will see God's favor like you've never seen it before. That problem will be the catalyst for God to open up supernatural doors.

The problems you are struggling with right now, because you're in faith, because you trust in the Most High, will not defeat you. Those problems will promote you. You will come out better off than you were before. I speak strength into you. I speak encouragement. I speak health. I speak favor. I speak determination. I speak new levels of increase. I declare victory over each one of your lives. In the name of Jesus.

- Joel Osteen
It's Your Time

This is another song from Andrew Gold called Lonely Boy. I wonder if there is any other feeling that is more universal than loneliness. I mean at some time, everyone gets lonely. For some it is more often than not. For others it may be once in awhile. But everyone experiences it. You can be with many people and still be lonely. Or you can be all alone and not be lonely which sounds like a contradiction but is not really. I think the key when you get lonely is not to give up and think things will never get better. They definitely can get better and will if you believe they will. You may have been lonely for days, months, or even years. But things can change almost instantly. You can't give up.

Lonely Boy - Andrew Gold

Youtube - Video

I have this movie on VHS and just watched it again. It's quite a good movie from 1975. Very atmospheric, moves along well, interesting story about murder and reincarnation. Worth seeing.

Merry Christmas to my quiz buddies and to anyone who has stumbled upon my blog and read an entry or too. Wishing you all peace, love, and harmony this Christmas.

Thank you for being a friend - Andrew Gold

Youtube - Video

At every stage of love the goal should be kept in mind. Uniting romance, relationship, and ascension is a code of compassion, which goes as follows:

Be kind to yourself and others.
Come from love every moment you can.
Speak of love with others. Remind each other of your spiritual purpose.
Never give up hope.
Know that you are loved.

If you practice these few things, you will be open to receive every lesson on the path in the spirit in which it is given - as an expression of divine love. The horrors of the world are undeniable, and few people even dream that they will go away. But they will, because love is the supreme reality, compared to which all else is temporary, fleeting, and unreal.

The love you seek is seeking you at this moment. Your longing, your deep fantasies about being loved are mere shadows of the melting sweetness that makes spirit want to love you. Be honest about your seeking, and be alert to the moments when love is showing itself to you. You are the only means that love has for conquering its opposition; therefore you are infinitely precious in the eyes of spirit. The messages of love may not be clear to anyone else around you, even those most intimate to you. That doesn't matter; they are meant for you and you alone. Be assured of that.

And above all, keep looking for clues.

- Deepak Chopra, The Paths to Love

People seem to either love Bruce Springsteen or can't stand him, usually coinciding with their age. I am in the group that loves his music, especially his early stuff. Bruce had a way of telling a story that was easy to relate to - growing up, work, girls, love, loss, despair, hope. I have found many of his songs that I can relate to.

One song I always loved is "Sandy" aka "4th of July, Asbury Park". It is unlike just about any other song he did. It is a soft, beautiful sounding song with lyrics that he wrote at his peak. It's a song about spending your days at the beach while you are young. I thought about that and when I was quite young I decided to become a beachgoer largely based on the pictures Springsteen painted in that song. The beach is a great place to do nothing, meditate, reflect, be by yourself, or with a crowd. To see beautiful girls in a casual setting. A place where you can recharge your batteries so to speak. Some people who are not beach persons don't get the appeal of laying on a beach doing nothing. But that's the purpose of going to the beach.

This youtube was made to honor a member of Springsteen's band, Danny Federici who died of a cancer a year or two ago. Federici did the amazing keyboards on this song. This song is timeless and can apply to any generation of young people looking for, sometimes finding, and losing love at the beach.

Bruce Springsteen - 4th of July, Asbury Park (Sandy)

Youtube - Video

That is a great line from this 1999 song:

Every Morning - Sugar Ray

Youtube - Video

It is fun having 5,000 shares of a stock that went up 50 cents today. It may be even more fun that the stock is still underpriced. :)

I heard a funny line about this picture of Obama getting a flu shot (if he indeed actually got one). Obama's arm looks just like Taylor Swift's arm.

http://whitehouse.blogs.foxnews.com/2009/12/21/president-obama-gets-his-h1n1-flu-shot/

This is one of my favorite songs of all time. It peaked at #59 on the charts in 1982 but that was mainly because its record label when out of business at the time. But the song is simply brilliant - words, music, melody, chorus. I don't know how a song could be better than this:

The Monroes - What Do All The People Know

Youtube - Video

Could you be the one I'm thinking of
could you be the girl I really love

All the people tell me so
what do all the people know

At some point, we all face major challenges - the loss of a job, a broken relationship, an illness - that could bury us in despair. Negative thoughts can overpower you at such times, bombarding your mind, telling you, it's over. You've seen your best days. Your future is tainted. Your life is ruined.

Maybe you've been through a loss and you don't see anything bright in your future. It feels like people are walking on top of you. You feel like you've been buried. Just remember, there is a process taking place. Like a little planted seed, new growth is springing forth in you - new talents, new determination, new opportunities, new friendships. Keep reminding yourself, "God is still on the throne. This is not the end. It's only the beginning. I've got comeback power in my DNA."

You may feel like you've made too many mistakes and missed too many opportunities. But God wants the rest of your life to be the most fulfilling, the most rewarding. Those dreams that you once had, they didn't die. They're still alive on the inside. You may have made poor choices, but they didn't bury you. They planted you. God has already arranged your comeback. Now you need to do your part and get your fire back. Quit living condemned. Quit listening to the accuser reminding you of everything you've done wrong. God knew every mistake you would ever make. The moment you asked Him for forgiveness, He forgave you. And the good news is, He didn't cancel your destiny. He forgave you. He didn't give away your assignment. Stand tall and say, "That's it. I'm not living condemned anymore. If God gave Moses another chance, He'll give me another chance. This is a new day. I'm putting on a new attitude. I know I've not been buried. I've been planted."

You have comeback power. You've been created to overcome every obstacle, to rise above every challenge. I want you to know that no matter what comes against you, it cannot defeat you. As long as you are letting God arise, your enemies will be scattered. Remember, in the tough times, that loss, that disappointment, that injustice is not the end. It's a new beginning. Dare to declare,, "I'm coming back and I'm coming back better." Those difficulties will give way to new growth, new potential, new talent, new friendships, new opportunities, and new vision. You will see God's blessings bloom in your life in ways you'd never dreamed possible!

- Joel Osteen
It's Your Time

I got another email from my Russian friend "Irina". I am now convinced that she is another scammer but I just haven't figured out her angle yet. Most scammers start with the story of their dead parents by the second email. Irina has a set of standard emails where she covers various topics, first one was "family" and this one is "hobbies". I give Irina credit for customizing these emails with my name throughout so it sounds like she is writing to me. I specifically asked her if she was a scammer, and if not, what her Spinchat name was. "She" doesn't address these questions at all, I guess it is not in the script to deviate from these letters. She also includes pictures in the emails and they are very professional looking not what someone would snap with a cheap camera. The latest picture shows her in a very short skirt. I know she is a scammer, but I am getting intrigued. I guess what can it hurt if she eventually needs help transferring money out of Russia? :))

Here is her latest letter:

Hello Sam!!!

How are you?

Thank you for your response to my last e-mail. In my opinion, it - so
beautiful that we write each other because of our message, we
investigate about each other more and more, really, Sam? I am
interested in our correspondence very, very interesting study about
you, about your life in your country, trust me, as everything I read
your letter with great pleasure! Well, Sam, I hope that it will
be interesting to explore with you about my enthusiasm, my favorite
things, like everything: from music? I love to listen to Russian and
foreign music Artists. Of the Russian musical artists I like to listen
to songs the groups "Maksim ',' S. Rotaru ',' Miragh '," "and so on.
You have heard about these bands? from foreign artists I like to
listen to "Madonna ',' Scorpions', Sting ', Brithney Spears and so on
.... Overall, I like to listen Good and modern music, Sam
Furthermore, I want to ask kai listen to music? It would be
interesting to examine me about it. Please let me, okay? Of the
movies? I love to watch comedy, fantastic films, romantic soap operas
and so forth. I watch TV. I have the TV, but we show only three TV
channels. I do not like horror movies. Comedies and serials - my
favorite. I do not go to movies very often, it is! My favorite movie
this year God luck Chack, PS I love you! In addition, I wish to inform
you that I like to read books, especially in literature Interior
authors: Tolstoy, Chehov, Puskhin and so on. The newspapers, comics,
classic literature or poetry. In the evenings the truth I read novels.
About food? Well, from the favorite dishes of food, I want to put
various kinds of soups, as I like meat Moreover, I do not want to hide
it from you:) I like fish and chicken very much, you are like chicken?
Very tasty, indeed? In addition, I like pizza very much. Very tasty
Moreover, I like pizza with cheese. I would like to say to you that I
like fruits and vegetables, especially, from apple lemon, orange,
bananas, tomatoes, cucumbers and so on, there are many types of
vitamins. Sam, you like to cook? I do not like awfully to
prepare for my family and friends told me once:) Also on my favorite
sport is responsible: Sport is very important to me. Without any
implementation, I will become an exercise volume. I hope to die, when
I - 100 years. On the morning, before the worker In the afternoon,
time for breakfast, exercise and water procedure, I have enough. I am
very active. I wanted to found a lot of sports, you like it? In the
winter I like to ski, will be on the cooled air. Also, I like to play
volleyball as well. But most of all I like aerobics, in my opinion,
this sport is going to help support my body in good shape. Also, I
wish to appeal to you that I love to dance dances:) Have you ever
danced the dance with any girl I am sure that you want to dance a slow
dance or waltz with me?:) That would be wonderful! Perhaps in the
future, we will dance What do you, it would be great! Incidentally, my
mother, friends and ask about you all the time:) is a special Mom, I
told my mom that you are worthy and good my mother is very pleased to
our conversation on the Internet And our relations, Sam. My mom
would like that we have good relations in the future, and quite
possibly in the future, we can become a splendid pair:), but remember,
Sam! We must examine each other more and more! Indeed ...? This
is very important for me, Sam! In fact in it, if you know that
on statistics, most couples are separated because they know each other
is not enough, and I do not want to make a mistake once, as I hope you
will understand I can, Sam, really? As I have told you before,
we must learn relative to each other in more and more of our e-mail.
Sam, I can not trust, I wrote to you so much e-mail. I hope
that it will be interesting to read about me more. Really? Sam,
I would be grateful if you want to write for me ambassador to your
e-mail about your enthusiasm, your hobbies, what Music you prefer? As
well as film and other? Incidentally, my mother and my friends ask
again what I told you big congratulations from them! He - as usual.
Sam, I will wait until after your e-mail! Sam, please
write to me as soon as possible! Well? Farewell, you quickly. My best
wishes to you, Your friend, Irina.

A few years ago, when I was a little less jaded, I had a wonderful moment with someone I cherished. I had met up with an old friend, someone who had taught me how to kiss a couple of years before. Well I think once you have feelings for someone they will always hold a special place in your heart. I was lucky enough to embrace her once more, and this song came on the radio. Without any thought we simultaneously started singing the openings words of this song to each other:

Let's Stay Together - Al Green

I'm, I'm so in love with you
Whatever you want to do
Is alright with me
'Cause you make me feel, so brand new
And I want to spend my life with you

Youtube - Video

If you put an email address on your spinchat profile, you get a lot of email from scammers with stories about their dead parents who left them millions of dollars and need your help in transferring it out of the country. They are easy to spot since they look for lonely men and start off saying how they want romance and are usually from Africa. A week ago I got an email from someone supposedly in Russia. I wrote back a snarky reply. Then I got another email and this "girl" wrote a customized email to me, customized in the sense of using my name throughout the email unlike most scammers who send a generic email. I wrote back and said I had my doubts about whether she was real. Then she sent me the following email. I still think there is a 99% chance that she is a scammer, but I am impressed that "she" took the time to write my name throughout the email. But in any case, I don't know if I am even interested in an email buddy even if it is legitimate. But I give "Irina" points for effort, whatever "her" motivation. I have met real people on Spin with weirder stories than this. This is the email:

Hello my new friend Sam!

I am so glad to get an answer to your question again! My dear friend,
Of course, whether you can be, wants, examining our correspondence
about Indeed correspondence also, indeed? we should examine whether
friend to friend More and more, I repeat it! Please, agree with me,
Sam! Sam My dear friend, I would to inform you about my family. I Want
to talk to you that I do not extended family. She - my mother Tatyana,
on the specialty of my mother – sells in the shop, we have good
understanding between us. As I I think that my mother to give me a
good upbringing and education. I I think that this is so good, and I
am proud that I have such a mom. In addition, I want to say to you
that I live with his family in different flats, because I for a long
time already to withdraw from age at which live with their parents,
and now I go to the removable apartment. Also, I wish to inform you
that I consulted with my mom about my Friends attention to you via the
Internet, it is estimated it as positively because it cares about my
future life course. My Mom would like, I am happy life, and like this,
I must find my face. As I have said to you earlier, I had never been
married. I only child in the family and have no brothers and sisters!
I do not see his father since childhood! My parents divorced, so that
when I was small, drink a lot of my father and mother, not to support
it! I do not I want to talk about it! So I said to you earlier, I work
Assistant dentist in a dental hospital. I am very pleased their work.
I likes to help people. I am very interested to hear your work O, Sam,
also, that you hold off time? Besides , I want to speak to you, which
I had never been away from Russia, I has never been in other
countries, but I want to travel at a again, it - so romantical, I
think:) It is gratifying, Sam, I must To finish my e-mail to you, I
hope that we will continue to comply with a friend, and you tell me a
lot more from you directly, and I will try to inform me directly as
More to the maximum extent possible in the future of e-mail. I I would
like to ask you about many things, Sam, and I hope that you will
understand my questions and I will be responsible for it. I want to
learn more on your country, please tell me about your family, your
friends. I I hope to see your message as soon as possible. Although
.... You friend Irina

Back when I was 26 I had my best office Christmas party, ever. No contest. I was working for a fairly small company on Long Island, several hundred employees and you knew who most of the employees were. So we had our office Christmas party that year. Now I am a little embarrassed to admit that the first time I ever danced was a couple of years before that at my first Christmas party there. I probably looked like Elaine Benes the first time I tried to dance. But for this party, I used to practice dancing by myself in front of a mirror. As it turned out that was probably a good idea.

The party started out kind of slow, and at the time I wasn't particularly best friends with anyone at the party. I had spent most of the night by myself. Then after a drink or two, my shyness kind of vanished. It was one of those rare times, at least for me, when you feel confident in yourself. So as the music was playing I got off my chair and headed for the dance floor. I didn't have anyone to dance with but that didn't stop me. Again, with the aid of alcohol I guess, I started dancing as I left my seat and moved into the dance floor. There were several women dancing with each other so I started dancing with them, and looking back, to my surprise they were not taken aback. One of the girls broke off from that group and I was dancing with her. I don't even remember who that was. From that point forward that night I was unstoppable on the dance floor.

I had many dances with people I worked closely with, and a couple of dances with some I didn't even know. I was asking anyone to dance. There was an older, short, heavyset woman that I somehow ended up with as a dance partner. As luck would have it, the DJ then decided on a slow dance. This woman reached up and draped herself off of my neck since I was quite a bit taller. Then during the dance she literally lifted me off my feet she was hugging me so tight. I felt a little embarrassed as I was not expecting anyone to pick me up off my feet.

The best of the evening was to come shortly though. At the time they always played Chubby Checker's "The Twist" sometime during the night. The Twist is one dance I excelled at. So I did a couple of good turns doing the Twist. I guess during that dance I had caught the eye of this girl Jeanette. Now Jeanette was a 21 year old blond that was absolutely stunning. Her personality left a little to be desired though, and I had never really spoken to her much. But she was hands down the prettiest girl in the whole company.

I had kept my eye on Jeanette during that evening. She was one of the only people who came with her boyfriend. Usually spouses and significant others don't come to office Christmas parties because the purpose of the party is to socialize with co-workers, not your spouse. Jeanette was decked out in a hot outfit with black leather pants. I had watched her and she had not danced with anyone the whole evening. Maybe her boyfriend didn't dance, and I guess guys were reluctant to ask her to dance with her boyfriend right there.

But then the great part of the evening. After I finished the Twist dance, I was tired and sweaty and went to sit awhile. Jeanette runs up to me and pulls me onto the dance floor. Man I felt great! Here I was, often I guess the office nerd, dancing with the hottest girl in the company. And having her pull me onto the dance floor, and being the only one she danced with that evening, not even her boyfriend. Single moments in life do not get much better. We danced for several songs and when we finished she gave me a long, slow, and tight hug. That was a great end to the evening.

Back in the office the next day, things were pretty much back to normal. I saw Jeanette and she was her usual cool self to me. She was not any more friendly than she had ever been. But it was still a great moment and a great party. It was a night when things come together, and you feel incredible and nothing seems impossible.

This song kind of sums up how the evening started when I ventured out on the dance floor without a partner and found many:

Billy Idol - Dancing With Myself

Youtube - Video

It's funny how often a song fits a situation. When I knew Chandra, the girl I described in the entry below, this song was popular. I thought it fit her perfectly. She was so pretty, yet sad, yet so much promise. In fact that is what I told her, the promise part. I told her she had so much potential. I recognized it and I wasn't sure if anyone else had told her that.

Shawn Mullins - Lullaby

Youtube - Video

she grew up with
the children of the stars
in the hollywood hills and the boulevard
her parents threw big parties
everyone was there
they hung out with folks like
dennis hopper, bob seeger, sonny and cher

now, she feels safe
in this bar on fairfax
and from the stage I can tell that
she can't let go and she can't relax
and just before
she hangs her head to cry
I sing to her a lullaby, I sing

everything's gonna be all right
rockabye, rockabye
everything's gonna be all right
rockabye, rockabye
rockabye

she still lives with her mom
outside the city
down that street about a half a mile
and all her friends tell her
she's so pretty
but she'd be a whole lot prettier
if she smiled once in a while
`cause even her smile
looks like a frown
she's seen her share of devils
in this angel town

But, everything's gonna be all right
rockabye, rockabye
everything's gonna be all right
rockabye, rockabye
rockabye

This story, like everyone I have blogged, is true. The names have not been changed either.

It was April 1996 and I was living an average, but boring existence. I had a good job, a great best friend named Rich who may have been my best friend ever, and things were going pretty good overall. But I wasn't satisfied. I didn't know what I wanted, until....

I saw this girl who at first sight totally hypnotized me. I thought she was amazingly beautiful and enchanting, though I would guess that not everyone would have been so enthralled with her. I can't really explain why I was so attracted to her other than she embodied a little of everything I wanted in a girl. She was young, I was getting older. She looked a little like some girls I was attracted to growing up, but much better looking. Still, that does not explain my utter attraction to her. So I took a leap of faith and somehow started talking to her. Somehow I avoided making an utter fool of myself and we became acquaintances, and maybe even friends. Then out of nowhere she said maybe we'll have dinner sometime. Sounds like a small thing but it was the biggest thing to me.

Her name was Chandra S., and turns out she was 19. I was older, and as a man I have to say that when a young girl shows attraction to you, honest attraction, that is such a life-affirming feeling. I hadn't attracted such a good looking girl when I was 19 and now to have a shot with such a girl, well it was a great feeling. Sure there was the age difference, but talking with someone younger lets you see life once again through the eyes of someone that age, and for a moment you are that age again.

So Chandra gave me her phone number and said I should call her. A day or so later, I got the nerve and called her up. Well I got a big surprise, she was apparently drunk when I called her. Then I got one of the bigger suprises I have gotten. She says to me, did I know that she was a heroin addict. Well, actually no I didn't. I had lived kind of a sheltered life and had not even smoked pot. So that threw me for a loop. I thought about it for the rest of the day. Here I was friends with this beautiful 19 year old girl who I was attracted to like no other girl I had ever met. And she was a heroin addict. Well after a few hours of deep thought, I decided I would pursue her anyway.

As I now know, there is nothing simple about someone with a serious drug problem. I also learned that even good people get addicted to hard drugs.

So a day or so later I called her up again. She wasn't high or drunk. Chandra was living with her mother at the time and was not working. It was July 3rd of that year and Chandra told me that her mother who was a musician was out of town. And she had very little food and no money. She wasn't asking for help, she was just saying this as we talked. So I offered to give her some money for the holiday weekend. She said OK to the offer but again she hadn't asked for any help. So here I was a straight laced accountant trying to save a teenage girl with a drug problem. I never would have thought I would be in that situation.

So Chandra says we can meet at her apartment which was located in the Hells Kitchen area of Manhattan, 43rd Street and 9th Avenue. I got out early from work that day because it was the day before July 4th and I took the subway to Times Square. I felt like a white knight coming to rescue the fair maiden. But I still had doubts whether I would see her, if she would be home, and let me into the building. It was a doorman building and he called up to her apartment to see if she would let me up. A bit to my surprise, she said sure, send Sam up. I had only the best of intentions in seeing her. No funny business. Then I experienced a little bit of dealing with an addict. Somewhere between the doorman calling and me getting to her door she had a change of heart. She didn't answer when I rang the doorbell. I left.

I did run into Chandra a couple of weeks later and she acted a little coy and said what's new. I was so attracted to her that she could have done almost anything and I would forgive her. We stayed friends for another year or so and I saw her occasionally. I didn't try to date her, although now I know that I probably would have had a real shot. What I did try to do was to help her turn her life around, as best I could. We talked about her drug addiction, and she wanted to get help. I tried to encourage her and did so in a non-judgemenatl way. I would still like her in any case. She got herself into a detox program and kicked her heroin habit, at least for awhile.

One thing I learned about heroin, is that it keeps the user thin. I saw Chandra a few months after she had gotten clean, and I would estimate she put on about 75 pounds. I guess people would have called her obese. However I was still seeing the inner beauty that I first saw, and she looked as beautiful to me as ever.

Well after another year or two I didn't see Chandra around anymore. I think I called her a time or two and she seemed like she was getting her life together. However even though I didn't see her anymore I was able to keep track of her through the years. The internet was brand new back in those days of the mid to late 90s. As fate would have it, I met someone online who knew her, and as it turned out, he married her. I am guessing he was about my age, and looking back I realized that might have been me. Though I don't know if I could ultimately have gotten past the drug problem. I found out that Chandra had a baby, and only a few months ago I found out online that she had gotten divorced. I don't know much more about her now, and I would guess that she has only a vague memory of me.

I like to think that maybe, in a small way, I was able to help her in getting over her drug habit by being supportive and encouraging. I know that I got a lot from knowing her. It made me think, that I could find someone who attracted me like no one I ever met before or after, and have her show some attraction in return. It was a small thing, but that first time when I called her she said something that touched me. It is probably meaningless to anyone else. But in her state when I called, which I presume she was drunk or high or both, she was not very coherent. In that state, she told me she thought I was cute. I knew in her condition she had no inhibitions and was being honest. It is silly, and superficial, but hearing that a young beautiful girl think I was cute made me feel so good.

So that is my story of when I tried to save a girl. Maybe I did in a small way. Who really knows why people come into our lives. Sometimes they do because they can both help each other and become better people. Maybe.

Awhile ago I registered on Facebook because I wanted to see someone's profile which turned out to be no one I knew. I haven't signed on since. Today I get a friend request from some girl who I have no idea who she is. What the heck I accepted her as a friend.

If you have ever been in love I think you will like this song.

Mercy - Love Can Make You Happy

Youtube - Video

P.S. I dedicate this song to everyone in love, who has loved, who has lost love, who is looking for love, or is not presently in love. :)

This is an old affirmation that some pyschologists believe really works. Who knows but it just might be better than replaying negative thoughts in your mind. From time to time during the day say this silently to yourself and see what kind of day you have:

Every day in every way I am getting better and better.

This is one of the most unique and memorable songs I have heard in the last 20 years. I have no idea what it means but it sounds a bit scary. These are two great clips that have the Pixies performing it when it was new in 1989 and more recently about 20 years later. See how the band has aged, except for the woman -

1989 - Monkey Gone to Heaven

Youtube - Video

2006 - How the band looks now doing the same song

Youtube - Video

New Radicals - You Get What You Give

Youtube - Video

I don't know how I left this song off my list of favorites, but it should be included. Maybe it was overplayed but it is simply beautiful itself. Any song that you know most of the lyrics to by heart is usually pretty good. It goes something like this (may be slightly off, this is from memory):

My life is brilliant
my love is pure
I saw an angel
of that I'm sure
She smiled at me on the subway
but she was with another man
I won't lose sleep over it
cause I've got a plan
You're beautiful...

Youtube - Video

This song is about a chance encounter that never became anything. However what happens when you spot your angel and something does happen? Maybe I will blog about Chandra sometime.

There has been a lot of great music the last 5 years. These are my favorite recent songs, although they change when I hear another song I like:

1. The Killers - Mr. Brightside
I think this is maybe the best combination of a great song and a video that totally interpets the song. I can relate to the raw emotion in the song having experienced something similar, I think. Though I am not sure whether I would be the Brandon Flowers character or the Eric Roberts one...probably Brandon Flowers...yep

Youtube - Video

2. Five for Fighting - The Riddle
I like just about everything that Five for Fighting does, especially "100 years" and "Superman". The band is really 1 guy and he does some really meaningful songs. This is simply a beautiful song that says a lot.

Youtube - Video

3. The Fray - Over My Head (Cable car)
The Fray is a very successful band that makes songs I turn up when they come on the radio. Plus the lead singer has a great voice. This may be my favorite:

The Fray - Over My Head (Cable Car)

Youtube - Video

4. Lifehouse - First Time
Lifehouse is another of my favorite bands. This song is another feel good song that I can't get enough of:

Youtube - Video

5. Taylor Swift - Love Story
This may be one of the best songs of the last 20 years. I am not surprised Taylor Swift has won so many awards.

Youtube - Video

When I was working at Citibank, I was a manager with a small staff. After one of the many reorganizations the company did, this girl Virginia was assigned to work for me. I hadn't hired her so sometimes these situations can be difficult if you don't get along. But after a somewhat rocky start we got along pretty good. Virginia was a couple of years out of college, I think about 24, very attractive, with an outgoing personality. Now I have never had a relationship with someone who worked for me. One of the reasons was maybe because every female that worked for me before Virginia had been married. And I wasn't trying to have a relationship with Virginia.

Virginia had a serious boyfriend that she had met in high school, and she talked about marrying him. But Virginia liked to socialize with people from work, and she used to hang out with my best friend at the time, a guy named Rich, who also worked for Citibank but in a different group. After a few months Virginia announced that she was now engaged and would be married in a year. That was not a surprise.

A short while later, I don't really remember how, Virginia suggested that me and her hang out over the weekend. This was kind of like she did with my friend Rich, and I know it wasn't anything romantic with him. So I said what the heck and we hung out. We used to do things like spend a Saturday at an amusement park, or walking in a park. Things like that. I guess we hung out maybe a half dozen times, maybe more. Now I started getting conflicted. First, I really liked Virginia and wouldn't mind a relationship with her. Second and most important, she was engaged and I was going out on a kind of date with her, albeit platonic. Third, my best friend Rich was single and I know would have liked to be her boyfriend. Finally, Virginia did work for me, so it would be kind of inappropriate to have a romantic relationship with her. Oh what a tangled web....

Less than a year later, I decided to leave Citibank. It was a couple of weeks before I was supposed to go on a business trip to California with several people from work including Virginia. After I tell everyone in the office I am quitting, Virginia came up to me and asked me to go out to California and hang out with her even though I wasn't working at Citibank anymore. I guess it took me about 2 minutes to say sure I'll go out to California to hang out.

I made a kind of clandestine trip out to California as only Virginia knew I was going out there. The other people from Citibank didn't know. I am not sure why we tried to keep it quiet since we were just pals really. We had a great time in California, me and Virginia went to Disneyland (we both loved amusement parks), and also went to the wax museuem and things like that.

So I came back from California and started my new job. Virginia and me continued to be good friends well into the next year and continued to hang out and do stuff together. It never ventured into a true romantic relationship and I wasn't going to try to do anything to hurt her upcoming marriage. As her wedding date approached I made the decision not to go to her wedding. I had never met her fiance and thought it would be weird to go to her wedding after having such an ambiguous relationship with her.

After she got married we didn't do stuff together anymore though we did keep in touch. Then she eventually left Citibank and we gradually stopped talking as we drifted apart. A few years later I heard from some friends that she had gotten divorced. I can't say I was surprised.

One of the things I remember about her is her favorite song, and this was before the Sopranos made it popular again:

Journey - Don't Stop Believing

Youtube - Video

If you are discouraged, right now, know that if God had not already released good things into your future, you wouldn't be here. He would have taken you on home. As long as you're breathing, there's another handful on purpose in front of you. Somewhere in your path there's promotion, increase, good breaks, divine connection.

When you really understand this principle, it puts a spring in your step. You'll go out each day excited, thinking "I wonder when that next handful is coming. It could be today. It could be tomorrow. It could be next week."

When you stay in faith, you will walk into God's blessings. Understand that He's already released into your future everything you need to fulfill your destiny. My prayer for you is that you will receive everything God has in store. I speak it over you right now; new seasons of increase. I declare favor over your life. I speak strength into you. I speak health. I speak wisdom. I speak creativity. I speak supernatural opportunities. They are coming your way. I declare it in the name of Jesus.

- Joel Osteen
It's Your Time

I think it is good to have fond memories of times, places, and people from your past. It's a way of experiencing good times all over again, thinking of what you had, what can be, and what might be again. Memories sometimes fade, so it is nice to have something to remember an event by. Often that can be a photograph or a card. I admit I have many keepsakes. I have the love card I got at 16 from a girl. I have kept many other things like cards and photos. It makes me feel good to look at them once in awhile.

I am also lucky that sometimes I pull out my CD of "New Wave Dance Hits of the 80s" and listen to an old good friend of mine. Sometimes I ask myself how did I get to make out with a rock star, however minor her moment of fame. I guess at times anything may be possible. It gives me a nice feeling to play the CD and here her voice once again. Back in 1997 I didn't know that this girl who I was singing to in my arms had had a hit record. She was just someone who was smart and nice to me. I didn't know that her song was also on another compilation CD that the Rolling Stones Record Guide gave 5 stars, its highest rating, called "Perfect Beats". It was a nice footnote to our relationship that she had accomplished something in the music business, but I cherished my time with her regardless of her past success. But it is nice to be able to play that CD and relive some memories.

Sometimes you can find love in the most unlikely places. Or maybe love finds you when you are open and ready to receive it.

This is the TV show with George Reeves. I got the series on DVD and it is really an excellent show, especially the first season. The later seasons are good too but are more comical and light in nature than the first season. The first Lois Lane was Phyllis Coates and I think she is bit better than Noel Neill in the later episodes. Overall a highly recommended show if it is the first time you have seen it or you saw them decades ago.

Within minutes of when I met this girl Beatrice I told her to lose her boyfriend and be my girlfriend. That is very untypical of my normal quiet self. She didn't say yes at first but she was interested I know. I worked on her for 2 months and she was mine. For awhile. The old boyfriend issue never went completely away however. I did the dance of romance with her for 2 years but it didn't change. Finally I found someone else. The last time I saw her I was with this other person, and Beatrice saw me with her. Beatrice knew she ultimately had decided what was to be, but I still loved her and I know she still loved me. If she didn't it would have been an easy breakup. But it wasn't and still isn't. At least for me. That last time I saw her I kissed her goodbye and left with another woman. I had to do it but it still breaks my heart.

This song could be about Beatrice and me:

Fergie - Big girls don't cry

Youtube - Video

QuizBot: Ending the game...
QuizBot: Rankings:
QuizBot: 1. sam!! (193) 2. trillian (81) 3. wastwd (16) 4. andrew777 (6)
Trillian: aww
wastwd: wd
Trillian: wd sam!! , nice
Trillian: wd all
sam!!: ty Trillian
andrew777: wd sam
wastwd: wd sam!! Trillian
sam!!: gg all
andrew777: wd trill
sam!!: ty
Trillian: thx

Now I don't normally recommend TV pastors, but I think Joel Osteen is sincere and knows what he is talking about. If you are open to it check out one of his books. It may just make a big difference in your life.

It is now approaching the 16th anniversary of the Long Island Rail Road massacre that killed 6 people and wounded about 20 others. It was a defining moment in my life, in a way, as I was a passenger on that train that night. I got off the train at the stop just before the gunman opened fire. I didn't know it at the time, but what I thought was a car backfiring as the train passed me on the station was actually the first gun shots of the massacre. The next couple of days I felt numb. There was no way to really comprehend what happened and how close you can be to such an event. So close yet ultimately completely safe.

http://www.nytimes.com/1993/12/08/nyregion/gunman-kills-5-on-lirr-train-19-are-wounded.html?scp=12&sq=L.I.R.R%3E+shooting&st=nyt

I bought my first computer in 1990. As soon as it was set up, I connected to the online service called Prodigy. This was pre-internet, and one of the main attractions it had was message boards where people wrote about all kinds of subjects. One of these was a money/stock message board. I had played around some in the stock market and found this board informative. That being said, stock message boards can be both good and bad. This one turned out good for me.

One of the stocks that I bought and sold during the 90s was an airline stock. It had flirted with bankruptcy but was making a comeback. In 1997 I had started writing on this public message board about this airline stock with a bunch of knowledgeable people. One was an airline pilot for the company, another was an employee who knew some of the day to day happenings, and most importantly was a professional investor who managed millions of dollars of investments. None of this was "inside" information, it was just people using what we knew to our advantage. We believed this stock was poised for a big turnaround while most of Wall Street thought this stock was a dog.

I gradually became convinced that this stock would have a big move up, and fairly soon. I was so certain, and with the information we exchanged on the public message board, I started accumulating stock in this company. I ended up with 7,000 shares, which was about half of my life savings. Any investment adviser would tell you never to invest that much of your money in one company. But big risks can also mean big rewards.

A few weeks later, earnings season was near. As we thought, the company totally blew away all earnings forecasts and was extremely profitable that quarter. The stock gained over 5 points that day. So the 7,000 shares I was holding was now worth $35,000 more than it did the day before. I wasn't greedy so I sold before the end of the day.

1. How you think is everything - Always be positive.

2. Decide upon your true dreams and goals - Write down your specific goals and a plan to reach them.

3. Take action - Goals are nothing without action. Just do it.

4. Never stop learning - Go back to school or read books.

5. Be persistent and work hard - Never give up.

6. Learn to analyze details - Get all the facts, learn from your mistakes.

7. Focus your time and money - Don't let other people or things distract you.

8. Be different - Following the herd is a sure way to mediocrity.

9. Deal and communicate with people effectively - No person is an island.

10. Be honest and dependable - Otherwise 1-9 won't matter.

Now for something completely different, from 1963:

Sukiyaki - Kyu Sakamoto

Youtube - Video

His most popular song, Ue o muite arukô ("I look up when I walk") was popular in Japan and North America. Released by Capitol Records in the US as Sukiyaki (Capitol 4945), it topped the Billboard pop charts in the United States for three weeks in 1963 — to date the only song sung entirely in Japanese to do so. The lyrics were written by Rokusuke Ei and the melody was composed by Hachidai Nakamura. The lyrics tell the story of a man who looks up and whistles while he is walking so that his tears won't fall. The verses of the song describe him doing this through each season of the year.

For any of my friends who have given me Spin gifts, as well as people I don't know very well, I wish to give you all a big thanks for the gifts you have sent my way. It makes me feel very good to know that you are my friends and like to read an occasional story in my blog. And even if you don't send gifts but check out my blog once in awhile a big thanks as well. Blogging is much cheaper snd maybe better than therapy. :)

The one thing that is never taught in driving school is to expect people, animals, and the environment to do ANYTHING at ANYTIME. Do not expect people to obey traffic signs and signals, or to stay where they should, or to be qualified to drive. Expect the unexpected at all times. When people do what they should, be thankful. Same thing with animals and road hazards.

Here is another story that some may not believe, but as usual it is a true story. I really have no one else I can tell this story to, so I am telling it here. It's not a real big deal but it is an interesting memory.

In the late 90s I knew this black girl who was just a friend, or at least that is how I thought of her. I think she was from the island of Jamaica, if I recall correctly. Very pretty, but I didn't really see us being a couple. But she seemed to like me, and would flirt occasionally. She had mentioned in passing that she was dating a professional wrestler. I didn't follow wrestling so I didn't follow-up, nor did I know if she was actually dating a wrestler.

Anyway, one day in October 1997, actually on my birthday, I saw her. She didn't know it was my birthday, but she seemed nervous when I saw her. She pulls me aside and says with all seriousness something I will never forget. She says to me "what do I have to do to get you to go out with me"? I have to say that was one of the best things anyone has ever said to me. Now I wasn't in love with her or even really wanted to be her boyfriend, but I could certainly love her as a good friend. I thought I had a good response back to her but maybe it wasn't. I said if you want to go out with me just ask me. I had to go somewhere soon after so we didn't talk much more that day but I think I gave her my phone number.

Over the next few days, she didn't call. That was OK because like I mentioned, I wasn't really overly attracted to her, although she was certainly a very pretty girl. The next time I saw her I think she made some excuse about not calling and she was a little distant. I asked her if I could have her number and she says no, that she was living with that pro wrestler that she had said she was dating. We were friends for a few more months until we drifted apart. So nothing came of it, but it was flattering to be pursued for awhile.

dawn2dusk: i know i know just-guessing :D
QuizBot: [QUESTION] Who was the Portuguese sailor who discovered a way to India at the end of the 15th century (full name)? (Genre: History, points: 3)
QuizBot: The answer is: Vasco da Gama
QuizBot: Ending the game...
QuizBot: Rankings:
QuizBot: 1. gelman (186) 2. dawn2dusk (38) 3. caitriona (13) 4. wastwd (9)
QuizBot: 5. angel2000 (4) 6. !_happy_girl_! (3) 7. orion (2)
Gelman: balboia
dawn2dusk: im okayish!
Caitriona: wd all gg
Gelman: gg dawn2dusk and Caitriona
just-guessing: wow.. congrats Gelman :o)
dawn2dusk: hats off to you Gelman
Gelman: tyty
Caitriona: u 2 Gelman
just-guessing: well done dawn2dusk :o)

Now I know I write sometimes about a lot of different girls that I was close to, and I guess it may seem unlikely that I knew that many. But everyone I write about was real and the stories are true...sure there is more to the stories than I can write here, but it doesn't take away any of the truths of the stories.

You see there was a time in my life when I was blessed to meet many different girls, and I got to know more than a few very closely. I learned how maybe the greatest lesson is to love as many as we can. I don't necessarily mean romantic love, though that is large part of love. When I had the chance to be tender with a girl, I took the leap of faith. To kiss someone, to hug someone, to caress another's face, well if you get the chance take it. To love openly and without conditions, without judgement, and with forgiveness, well this is what I think true love is. When you can love freely and genuinely, well I think you are in your highest state of being.

Which reminds me of this song, which I dedicate to a half dozen, or maybe a dozen, girls I loved before....some of which I have blogged about, and really did exist as I wrote.

Willie Nelson & Julio Iglesias - To All The Girls I've Loved Before

Youtube - Video

BTW, I look more like Julio than Willie :)