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Mariah · (), · female · 23 years old · registered since 2015 · last online - today

A Poem: Living An Uncomfortable Lie

Poems ·

I wish I could glide along the ice,
that's frozen over the river we used to cross.
I wish I could be comfortable,
with the lie that we try to lead.

But the truth is,
I have a lot of work to do.
And I have a lot of dreams,
and I'm sure it'd be easier with you.

Things could be easier with you,
that's what everyone keeps telling me.
Like I'm making the wrong choices,
but what if everything else is wrong, too?

I've limited choices,
and I haven't been making the right ones.
And that's my fault,
that's my fault alone.

And we've both drove ourselves here,
we've both been strapped in the front seat.
And we took our turns,
pretending to know where to go.

And I just don't want to hate myself,
and it's not just about the weight gain or the choices.
But it's everything going up in flames,
right before our very eyes.

I've never thought I could love someone so much,
and hate the person they'd become.
And we've both changed,
and maybe your own hate for me is why you act this way.

I'm gasping for air,
and I try to grab for you and you kick me in my teeth.
And I guess this is how it's feel,
and karma does come for us all.

So, I have a lot to pay for.
But I won't throw myself a pity party.
Because I'll crawl out of this cycle,
it just feels comfortable.

But is money,
worth selling our very souls?
Everything is regret,
only took a few years to get past one.

January 31st, 2017 06:17
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