I've gotten sick.
That much is true.
' Went to the Doctor,
and got diagnosed with "you".

Aparently you
are the pain in my heart.
And again it was you
who woke me up with a start.

Is it then, you
who's infected my world?
When I ran to the bathroom
was it you who I hurled?

In case this message,
is hidden from view,
Here is my diagnosis:
I AM SO SICK OF YOU!

Oh WOW people are retarded. By the way, the lyrics to Human by the lyrics are DANCER. Not "denser" not "dancers" not "cancer" not "sweater" it's fucking dancer- "Are we human or are we dancer?" PERIOD. So accept it and get over the fact that you are too DENSE to accept that some things are not as immediate and obvious as "the sky is blue." Even though one can say that even that is arguable. See? So STFU. But actually don't because I am oh so highly entertained.

I've been hungry
I've been blind
He wasn't what
I had in mind

Been through Hell
Through misery
It's nothing compared
To what he gave me

He was yours
Before he was mine
You want him back
That suits me fine

I never betrayed you
Contrary to belief
Take it up with him
I'm not a thief

From my view
You were meant to be
It's not my fault
If he doesn't agree

I'm forgetting you
And all this strife
So please take off
And have a nice life

i could write you a song about raindrops and rubies, but i don't think you'd want to listen. i could hold you close and tell you love stories, but i think you would just fall asleep. and i could play with your fingers and tap out a rhythm on your collar bone, but you'd just pull away and turn on the radio so you could listen to something better.

you always pull away. why do you always pull away?

you got mad when you saw the papers. you said you hated that everything i write is sad, that every paper you found in my desk was about heartbreak or death or insanity or hopelessness. you said you wanted me to be happy. but if you really did, you would try to understand that heartbreak isn't always bad and death isn't always ugly; that insanity is relative and hopelessness can be beautiful.

your understanding is what would really make me happy.

today i decided something: i am going to stop trying.
i am going to lay on my bed today. i am going to stare at the ceiling. i am not going to pick up the phone when you call. i am not going to smile back at you when you greet me as you walk by.

i am going to be empty space, ready for you to fill. you can tell me what to write, you can tell me how you want to cuddle in the car. you can tell me how to kiss and how to talk, and how to hold your hand. you can make me from the ground up to the sky, exactly how you want me. i will be a mass of human building blocks and you can stack me just the way you like.

would that make you happy?

i didn't think so.

It is damn cold outside. Like, a biting kind of cold. In Los Angeles! I mean it is December, but this is conneticut. If I want to go to college in the East bridge, I better get used to this. You see I like the idea of cold, but then when I actually experience it, it's not so nice.

So I decided to finally start a blog.

My bf has been pushing me to do it for a long time now. I was a little afraid because anyone can see it... but ah, what the heck. I need a way to express my opinions without annoying everyone around me. Now I will annoy random internet people instead. Or no one, depending on how popular this blog gets. I predict: not very much. It's good to have low expectations.

About me: I'm originally from San Juan Puerto rico
I speak Japanese, English, French, Spanish, and Moroccan Arabic.
On Spinchat, I develop by myself as LUNA San, and am also the co-creator of the Yumi & Ryu products with the developer, Jinx (clothing, texture art by myself / hair, 3d models by Jinx).
Recently, I've started another collaboration with my friend eviann, a 3d-modeller from Japan. She is the creator of the Rikey hairs, Goddess Heads, Anime wings, and hopefully more to come. ^^ Some of her meshes will be derivable from our collaborative brand, QTMJ.

General Interests:
<3 My boyfriend <3 and my cats. =^_^= All forms of Art. Graphic Novels!! (Sandman, Death). Console & PC games. Strong French roast coffee! Swiss&Belgian Chocolate. Japanese sweets. Caribbean beaches. Roller coasters. Traveling. Designing and creating virtual clothing/products... surprise surprise. ^^

Music
I am mostly a fan of industrial music.. but I also like punk (punk-rock/acid punk/ electro punk/etc..), rock, indie, acid jazz, trip hop, reggae, and just about every other genre. I just love *music* and going to live shows.
Although my favourite musician/singers are Trent Reznor (nine inch nails) & Bob Marley - I like many other singers/bands such as: (in no particular order)
sneaker pimps, iamx, ohgr, skinny puppy, pigface, ministry, mindless self indulgence, peeping tom, electrocute, the cure, tool, the doors, the smiths, robots in disguise, placebo, brian molko, chikinki, kill hannah, deerhoof, chris corner, spiderbait, macy gray, the pixies, franz ferdinand, white zombie, fiona apple, she wants revenge, chris vrenna, saul williams, garbage, muse, kmfdm, malice mizer, morningwood, tsar, cake, sleater kinney, the dead 60s, gorillaz, the organ, snake river conspiracy, ben harper, faith no more, anthrax, tv on the radio, autolux, braniac, pink grease, morcheeba, eels, tenacious d, tom waits, miyavi, prodigy, tori amos, disposable heroes of hiphoprisy, yeah yeah yeahs, emilie simon, dead milkmen, portishead, beth gibbons, dead prez, arctic monkeys, hushpuppies, juliette lewis and the licks, oasis, flight of the conchords, pj harvey, interpol, aphex twin, lcd sound system, the rapture, the strokes, massive attack, depeche mode, matisyahu, the 5 6 7 8s, suicidal tendencies, daft punk, mike patton, weezer, angela mccluskey, mr bungle, my life with the thrill kill kult, the killers, the subways, L7, infadels, radiohead, velvet acid christ, moi dix mois, dead kennedys, jello biafra, and the list never ends... :)
Movies
Sin City, The Professional/Leon, Kafka (Steven Soderbergh), The Boondock Saints, Natural Born Killers, Battle Royale, Snatch, Kill Bill 1&2, Mirrormask, Animatrix, Akira, Requiem for a Dream, Midnight Express, Brain Candy, No Country for Old Men, Pan's Labyrinth, Fight Club, The Fountain, One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest, The Crow, Grave of the Fireflies, and also various documentaries & biographies.
Books
Graphic novels (preferrably Vertigo comics): "The Sandman", "Death", "Hellblazer", "The Watchmen", "Shade the Changing Man" , "Lobo", "The Crow", "The Mask", and of course "Tank Girl".
Books: "The metamorphosis" by Franz Kafka, "Neverwhere" by N.Gaiman, "Smoke and Mirrors" by N. Gaiman, European Fables/Short Stories (Grimm, La Fontaine, Maupassant, Aesop), "Les Fleurs Du Mal" by Charles Baudelaire – all poems by Baudelaire, Verlaine, and Rimbaud, writings by Friedrich Nietzsche, Franz Kafka, Edgar Allan Poe, Voltaire, Victor Hugo, and MANY others!...
Heroes
My Brother . Neil Gaiman. Dave McKean. James O'Barr. Jamie Hewlett. Salvador Dali. H.R. Giger. Vincent Van Gogh. Charles Baudelaire. Edgar Allan Poe. Friedrich Nietzsche. Franz Kafka. Voltaire. Bob Marley. Trent Reznor. Christopher Bachalo. Frida Kahlo. Everett Peck... too many more to mention!